SWFC TAKEOVER: The Party Starts Here!

SWFC TAKEOVER: The Party Starts Here!

December 2010…not even four years ago yet and we were at the gates of death with the club on its knees and pleading for a saviour to keep the old girl afloat…

It looked hopeless…it was all over…we were all sharing texts, nauseous, literally worried sick…and for the first time all saying out loud …

’This is it isn’t it? It’s all over’

It still makes me feel slightly uneasy just thinking about it and just as we’d given up hope, in rode our knight in rusting armour, Milan Mandaric…

Of course most footy fans knew of him already from his previous football club dealings and public arguments with managers but we didn’t really care…we’d have done a deal with the devil himself to keep the club afloat just one more day.

As it was we didn’t need the devil, we just needed a charming and charismatic Serbian with a big but not bulging wallet and without even thinking about checking out the club’s finances properly, with a swish of his magic wallet he paid off the £9 million tax debt and led us all to safety…


Milan SWFC

This charming man

Milan is a man well versed in working the media and even more at ease in working a crowd, telling the people what they want to hear and with every word he uttered Wednesday fans fell ever deeper under his spell….

It was hard not to like the man as that disarming charm was all-encompassing and with most football fans easy meat for talk of bright futures, steadying the ship and building for the future with a liberal sprinkling of ‘loving this club and its history’ and ‘these fans are the best’ even the coldest most cynical Wednesday heart soon warmed to the man and leapt on board the love train…

It’s only recently that his interest…sorry….’love’ for this great club seems to have been on the wane and whilst I think this is definitely the right time for Milan to go, maybe a little late if anything, we have more than that fateful day to thank him for…

We now have a club built on a proper foundations, solid foundations and not the crumbling pile of rubble he inherited.

It took a lot of doing, not just rooting out the rot but changing the mindset and approach to how to run a football club and how to keep things in check and not simply chase every shiny thing that came along.

Megson a

Unfair treatment?

Despite what they would have you believe, football fans don’t know everything about football and even less about running a football business so it needed someone like Milan to come along, schmooze with us and keep us sweet whilst all the time in the background going about doing the unpleasant stuff and in some instances, the very unpleasant stuff…

Hiring and firing people we had come to love…the treatment of Gary Megson still sticks in the craw a little, especially when compared to the amount of rope Dave Jones was given before suffering the same ignominious fate.

But all these decisions are made with a clear conscience and a sound business brain from Milan because not only is he a successful businessman, he isn’t weighed down by fan baggage like the rest of us.

The decision making, with its highs and lows, things we agree with, disagree with and those that we squirm at, have all been done, or so it seems to this naïve heart, with the best of intentions for this football club and we have to thank him for that…

We now have a club that is more sound…more solid than it’s ever been in my lifetime…we have an academy that is once again turning youngsters into players and not into passing strangers…we have a manager and coach that most definitely love being at this club and are striving with everything they do to get us back onto the righteous path, no matter how tight constraints have been they’ve worked through them with a smile…

The fans love them both and the players too and they’ve reacted well to all this by turning around what looked two months into it, a doomed season.

We have new faces and fresh heroes and we also have young heroes bursting with potential and a willingness to be a part of this…and this has all come from that one man, jumping in with both feet when really, had he done his homework properly, he wouldn’t have gone near us with a long one.

Mission ImpossibleHe came to this club with a mission and it seems to all intents and purposes that mission is now fulfilled.

So why do I still have my finger hovering over that party button?

It can’t simply be because I’m a miserable old curmudgeonly bastard…although that will obviously be a huge part of it.

But like everyone else I’ve waited such a long time to press that button and now it’s here, now it’s finally, once and for all, most definitely without question here….

I have to be honest…it scares me.

I know nothing about this new bloke, Mr Hafiz Mammadov, other than the fact he has a lot of money which he’s made from the oil business, which could mean we get a free bottle of multigrade with every home shirt from now on, Oh and he has dabbled in footy before with a couple of clubs but as far as his background goes I’ll leave that to fans of other clubs to dig the dirt on him and use it against us. Like most businessmen that takeover clubs he talks about the future and getting back to the Premier League and he’s telling a lot of Wednesday fans, just like Milan did, exactly what they want to hear and it’s not any of this that scares me to be honest….I think it’s because I’ve become accustomed to how we are.

I’m used to us being sh*t.

Default settingOK, every now and again we’re not sh*t and we have a 6-0 beating of Yorkshire rivals….or we score with a last minute goal….or even better we steal their second in the league slot from them on the last day and get promoted.

But since the heady days of playing with the big boys at the top table we’ve been by and large just plain old sh*t….and sometimes REALLY sh*t and the worst part? I’ve got to like it.

Now there’ll be those that scoff at that but it’s a suit we’ve become accustomed to wearing, it fits well…we like it…it’s comfortable, we don’t care what others think and there’s lots to like about a sh*t suit…

Sh*t doesn’t let ya down…when you’re sh*t and the world knows you’re sh*t, you aspire to nowt and expect now, it’s the footy fans best defence mechanism.

Sh*t has been the default setting for Sheffield Wednesday for so long now we haven’t even thought about the reality of a proper takeover.

Not a Geoff Sheard type takeover, poncing around in a designer suit looking all mysterious and wotnot but one of them proper ones you hear about with other clubs…other clubs who used to be smaller than us, below us in the league by 473 divisions but now find themselves way above us.

Now things may be about to change…we may have to adjust our default settings…turn the club off and back on again because now we have someone taking over from dear old Milan that could move us on to the next stage.

It’s still someone who doesn’t have a wallet the same size as the one Abramovic uses but eminently bigger than Milan’s little wedge….and now we will of course have to endure all the sensible Wednesday fans telling us, as I outlined above that they don’t want money thrown at the club, they don’t want this, they don’t want that…they want us to continue to build that steady foundation and continue to build for the future.

The hard work is done but we must continue it and grow nice and steady, bring players on, build the academy and make our own players giving us a brighter future…



Loadsa Money

Loadsa Money!

If I have to stop being scared and fearing what’s coming, if I have to accept change and embrace the new Wednesday and there’s money to chuck at this baby then let’s throw the whole lot at it….

THANK YOU Milan….for the steadying!
THANK YOU Milan….for the foundations!


I’ve had enough….

I don’t want steady away anymore…I don’t want to build for the future and you can most definitely sod the foundations!

I’m sick of the chuffing foundations (apart from Build Me Up Buttercup)…

The foundations are as solid as they’re ever gonna be and as for slow and steady, how chuffing slow can we go?

We have been absolute cack for far too long now….we are the standard for setting ya steady by…in the dictionary it now says, Steady: Sheffield Wednesday. (Although to be fair in the same dictionary under ‘Cack’ it says: See Steady)


We’ve done steady!
We’ve done foundation laying and done building!

Now it’s time to party….

Oh and if we are gonna party then let’s do it in style….

I don’t just want quality players for this club giving their all on the pitch. I don’t want ‘triers’ anymore. I don’t want players that love to wear the shirt, who give their all and deliver nowt….I’ve had enough of them, now I want sexy motherf00kers!

Sexy motherf00kers running sexy motherf00ker little rings round other useless motherf00kers.

But I want more than that, I want so much more….

Of course we want them to do well…we want to fight for a place not just in the top six of the Championship but the top two and beyond….but I am so absolutely fed up of waiting for this ship to turn around that if this isn’t now fully turned it never will be….

YES! Buy the players…

YES! Get us climbing the league…

YES! YES! And as they say on that shampoo advert…YES!

Now I want more…

SWFC Seats

We deserve it

I also want comfy seats…with arm rests and padding, lots of padding, in fact I want a padded reclining seat with loads of leg room.

I want a little lamp at the side so that I can read when the game gets a bit dull…

I’d like waitress service on the Kop….in fact a button on the arm of my new padded recliner that I can press for the attention of the waitress….

I’d like not just a new scoreboard but a screen in front of every stand…in fact sod that, in front of every seat so we can watch the replays and I can moan a bit more when we see over and over again that the referee got it wrong yet again…scratch that! Why do it myself?

I’d like the club to employ moaners so I don’t have to do it myself…just below the waitress button I want a ‘MOAN’ button.

Press it and out comes a spotty youth from under your seat and whinges a pre-selected set of moans and family friendly abuse…a kind of ‘abuse garcon’ if ya like and he can bring me a beer whilst he’s about it (and look sharp too, I haven’t got all day)…

Fan in seat 77 of the kop would like to say...

Fan in seat 77 of the kop would like to say…

I’d like the players to have earpieces that I can send instructions to…and that my abuse garcon can shout on my behalf…and I’d like a motherly figure to come and tuck me in if I should fall asleep halfway through the game and the players could tiptoe off the pitch….

And if this isn’t finally the right time to introduce Nacho Hats to Hillsborough then I don’t know what is!

Now we have money NONE of this is too much to ask for, so stop fannying about Mamma.

You’ve had time to settle in and find ya feet, either make this lot happen right now or sod off please because once I press this ‘PARTY ON’ button there’s no going back!

Mamma…We’re all crazy now!

If we’re really gonna ask our new owner for daft things before Mr Mammadov’s even settled in then we may as well go the whole nine yards and ask for what we REALLY want….Nacho Hats and Abuse Garcons…it’s the future!

Welcome to Wednesday!

Owls Alive
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