Rock n Goals No.4 Hartlepool United

No.4 Hartlepool United at Victoria Park

Coca-Cola Cup 2nd Rnd: Hartlepool United  2 – 2 Wednesday

Date: 6th October 1992

Ref: P Harrison (Oldham)

Attendance: 4, 667

Hartlepool United
Hodge, R Cross, P Cross, Tait, McPhail, Emerson, Johnrose, Olsson, Saville, Nobbs, Honour.

Subs: Proudlock, Wratten
Sheffield Wednesday
Pressman, Anderson, Worthington, Palmer, Shirtliff, Pearson, Wilson, Waddle, Bright, Warhurst, Hyde.

Subs: Bart-Williams, Woods
Goals from Gordon Watson, Mark Bright and a certain Mr Danny Wilson a fortnight or so earlier had given the Owls a comfortable 3-0 cushion from the 1st leg at Hillsborough ahead of this, their first ever competitive trip to Victoria Park. Despite that, the Owls still played a fairly strong side for this 2nd leg clash, as was the norm in the days before “squad rotation”

Any lingering doubts about the outcome of the tie were firmly banished a mere 22 seconds in as the Owls took the lead on the night to stretch their overall advantage to four.

Chris Waddle smashed in a shot that rebounded straight back to him off the bar and he then crossed for Mark Bright to open the scoring.

Lennie Johnrose and Dean Emerson were both unlucky to see efforts come back off the bar for the home side in a lively first half.The Owls extended their advantage on the hour when Paul Warhurst tapped home after former Owls keeper Martin Hodge had failed to hold a free kick from Nigel Worthington.

Hartlepool did not give up though and just four minutes later they got on the scoresheet when Andy Saville scored from the spot following a foul by Carlton Palmer on Brian Honour.

The home side’s endeavour was rewarded when they equalised on the night in the very last minute through Johnrose, who snaffled up the rebound after a Paul Olsson effort had rebounded from the crossbar.

It meant the Owls progressed to the 3rd round of the competition by an aggregate score of 5-2.Further victories against Leicester City, Queens Park Rangers, Ipswich Town and Blackburn Rovers meant a trip to Wembley for the Owls and a final showdown against Arsenal, where despite taking the lead through John Harkes, Wednesday were beaten 2-1 thanks to goals from Paul Merson and Steve Morrow.

After the game, goalkeeper David Hodge, who was known as “D Hodgy”, claimed his performance had been “Good Enough”. Despite this, he told the manager that whenever the team played pre-season friendlies, he wanted to play somewhere else other than in goal. He insisted he was “Staying Out For The Summer”

Hartlepool had a pair of brothers in the side although they were permanently angry. In fact they were known as the Cross Brothers. One of them, Christopher, put in a really poor performance and the manager shouted to him afterwards “Is that the “Best That You Can Do”?” Cross maintained his performance was “All Right” and stormed out on horseback doing an impression of Paul & Linda McCartney and Denny Lane. He often used to “Ride Like The Wings”

His brother Kriss Cross, had the view that “It’s A Shame” Hartlepool were out of the cup, but admitted there was a big “Jump” in class between the teams. He hadn’t played in the first leg after not turning up and when his manager asked what had happened he said “I Missed The Bus”

One of the Hartlepool players was just returning from injury. He had been involved in a nasty incident in a recent friendly against CSKA Moscow that had resulted in painful internal injuries for both players involved.

A watching Def Leppard remarked “Can’t stop the pain inside, when Love and Tait collide”Some of the Hartlepool players enjoyed a kebab after the game and the manager confirmed the order with each player before going to buy them. “So it’s Shish – Emerson, Chicken – Proudlock and Doner – McPhail”

She was reasonably famous in the 90s. For a bit. The gag works.

Midfielder Jimmy Saville was pleased with the performance but said they needed to transfer this form to away games as they were poor on their “travels”. He was nursing a slight injury and was perplexed how to sort it. His physio told him a short spell in the “Gym’ll fix it”. Once fit, he took the entire squad away to Blackpool, where the team enjoyed eating their packed lunches on the Revolution ride. He was big mates with Ipswich Town’s manager but confided in another friend that he was fed up of his incessant talking. “All he does is rattle rattle Jewelly Jewelly” he said.

One of the players was very unpopular with the fans, who didn’t want him in the team. Indeed they made their frustrations known with a rousing chorus of “Nobbs Out!” during the game, to much hilarity. Similar incidents also occurred involving Julian Dicks, Arthur Cox and Alan Pardew.

Rumours spread after the game that one of the Hartlepool players had failed a drug test. This was after someone said they had spotted “Olsson’s pills” in the changing room. But it turned out only to be some bottles of lager for the team to share after the game.

The Hartlepool manager used to get the players in to help decorate his house. He would allocate one room to one player and ran through these with the team prior to them starting the work. “Honour – me lounge, Johnrose – me bedroom and…….. Wratten – me kitchen” “What am I gonna do?” said a passing UB40, but nobody heard them.

Brian Honour had also teamed up with the lead singer of Cameo to record a few songs. Everyone was impressed with the Honour/Blackmon partnership.

Referee Harrison had recently been involved a controversial game where he had angered the Reading manager Brian McDermott.

In fact he was so angry he ordered one of his players to start fighting the ref. “I’ve Got My Manset On You” he shouted at the ref during the attack.

Hartlepool as a place is, of course, well known for the time many years ago when locals found The Monkees washed ashore and then hung them, believing them to be French spies. The mother of one of the Monkees, Mike Nesmith, invented Tippex. Correct me if I’m wrong.

Top 5 UK chart week ending 10th October 1992

Preben’s Knees Are Good – The Shay Men

The Halifax Town squad were big fans of 80s Danish striker Preben Elkjaer, and were angered to hear many people say his body was in a bad way. So much so they recorded this tune to prove the player’s knees were still in decent shape.

Blue Oyster Cult also recorded a tribute to their favourite Danish player and how he wasn’t as scary as some thought he was, entitled “Don’t Fear The Rieper”
Ince: My Life – Dr Alban

Dr Alban (real name: Alban Nwapa and almost certainly not a certified medical practitioner) recorded this tribute to self styled Guv’nor Paul Ince. He also recorded a tune that eerily predicted how the Wednesday team would look this season, with “No Coke” (It got to number 6 in Norway – the gag works)

Talking of Norway, he also recorded a song about his favourite Norwegian former Oldham and Bradford defender “Sing Gunner Hallelujah”
Sol leaping, Zat alight – Tasmin Archer

Tasmin may have had a face a mother could love, but she could knock out a decent tune when she wanted to. Unfortunately it appears she never wanted to but anyway this song about the time she saw recently retired defender Sol Campbell jumping on an ablaze Zat Knight was a big hit.

Whether this incident occured in Morecambe or not is unclear.
End Of The Rhodes – Boyz II Men

This emotional tribute about the time SWFC goalkeeping coach Andy Rhodes retired from playing gave Boyz II Men a big hit, following on from their other football player related hits “Motownphilly King”, “I’ll Make Love To Youl (Mawene)” as well as a song about their season ticket at Sheffield United they’ve had since 2007: “4 Seasons Of Loneliness”
Baker’s Treat – Undercover

Former Barnsley and Ipswich Town goalkeeper Clive Baker often used to reward his team mates with a little treat after games if they had won, and Undercover recorded this in tribute.

They weren’t the only ones to record songs about their favourite goalkeepers, there was Billy Ocean’s “Zenga Going Gets Tough, The Tough Get Going”, The Jacksons’ “Kahn You Feel It?” and Ice Cube’s “Cech Yo Self”

SATURDAYS GAME – 1st October 2011


After the game, win, lose or draw the Hartlepool players will go out for a meal together. All the players order different things. Ritchie Humphreys has beef, Sam Collins has pork and Steven Has Lamb.Andy Rafferty says he won’t be too disappointed should they not perform too well against Wednesday because “if they get it wrong they’ll get it right next time”.

He’d prefer the game to be an evening kick off as he thinks they would have a better chance against “Night Owls”. He was once a team mate of the aforementioned Clive Baker and often enjoyed a “Baker’s Treat” after a victory.

Peter Hartley has scored a few jammy goals recently. He has plenty of pace in him. People often comment they’ve seen Hartley Hare about.

James Brown was asked how he felt ahead of the game, replying “I Feel Good”. He has hit upon a bad time personally and is currently homeless and having to reside in his automobile, although he always tries to keep upbeat, cracking jokes and singing songs. He says it’s not too bad “Living In A Merry Car”

Darts will be in attendance, hoping to see their favourite American born Hartlepool player. They are huge fans of the “Boyd From New York City”

Andy Monkhouse was recently disturbed when he was at home and he heard a loud banging on the door. He opened it up and was stunned to see an American talk show host’s fish based early evening meal laying there on the doorstep. It has happened a few times more since and Monkhouse is starting to dread whenever “Oprah’s Tuna Tea Knocks”.

Gary Lidl should play as long as he’s got his shopping done in time first. Clinton Morrison, John Aldidge and Peter Bonetto have similar problems.

There was doubt whether Ritchie Humphreys would be available for the game, but when asked Mr Humphries declared “I’m free!”

Liam Mooney has been out of the side recently and feels he is getting a bum rap from the manager. But he’s not getting angry about it, choosing to just turn the other cheek. He thinks he can crack a place in the team soon and wipe out the bad feeling.


The game will be reffed by Mr Graham Salisbury, who will be taking charge of The Owls for the 11th time. Wednesday have won only one of the previous ten, a 2-0 home success against Watford in September 2008. He has previously reffed this fixture before, a 1-1 draw in October 2003. He also famously once awarded a penalty to Wednesday at Hull in a game that was on Sky, hilariously mistaking Deon Burton’s hand for Danny Mills’

I’d heard rumours he was poorly ahead of this game so I rang the Football League for confirmation, asking “Is Salisbury ill?” but they said although he’d had an accident with a “Sledgehammer”, he was now fine and would be ok for the game.

He doesn’t like it when players “Steam” in to challenges.
He thinks it’s time he move up to more high profile games.

He thinks he’s ready for the “Big Time”. He thinks the lower sections of stands in football grounds should be cordoned off as he prefers “Games Without Front Tiers”

Keep on Rockin
TWITTER: @OwlsAlive

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